As this year comes to an end I could simply sit and reflect on all that it had offered and taken away from me. In fact, I could lament about the things I did wrong or should have done differently or how I didn't fully capture those fleeting moments I so respect to hold in my hands and heart. I could also rejoice in what 2011 gave to me and how I took hold of what was important and let go of the toxicity of life. But instead of being redundant and overly reflective, I choose to take this past and throw it out. Seems a bit volatile and perhaps unappreciative, but its what we need to do, more often than annually, to refresh ourselves and grow into being our best. A year of twists and turns, ups and downs, whirlpools of emotion and global chaos has reminded me of the importance of learning, growing, listening and hearing.
I will, however, share in what this year has brought to me: not things, but rather, energy. I began 2011 with focus and control in my personal, public and work lives. I knew if I just stayed in control and focused on the bigger pictures, the year would bring to me only what I could handle and manage without the noise. Truly, once committed to that perspective, the universe opened itself to me and I tangibly embraced each day as if it were the first day of the rest of my life. Work got smoother, I personally grew more balanced and publicly, I was willing to show myself to the people and places I would normally resist. Each night when I was ready to lay my head down for rest, I breathed easier with a sense of accomplishment. I awoke with a world to conquer, me against it, but it wasn't daunting. It was exhilarating. Day by day, step by step, the universe offered me opportunities both great and small. If we talk about the year as being divided into quarters, the first 2 quarters were brilliant and I thank them.
3rd quarter!! I lost my focus and my balance. I stopped capturing the right moments and became distracted by the wrong ones. It only took a single distraction to throw off my balance and momentum. That single moment, again, which was wrongfully accepted into my world, took me on a ride for which I didn't wear my seat belt, thus, it was dangerous and empty. I, on the other hand, tried all I knew to keep it in check. It wasn't right, it didn't work, I lost my step.....it never should have happened. But it did happen and as I began my last and final quarter of the year, I have come to let it pass as a brief experience and test of truth, ability, reaction, caution and endurance. We all have things we so want to be better at and we all have things that keep us from actually being better. But, we let those things happen to us, often times unconsciously. We as people have the obligation to be our authentic self at all times both to ourselves and to others. If we continue to be something we aren't or pose for the attention we crave, then we don't move forward. We simply stay stationary with disrespect to yourself. Time moves fast. Why get tired out by not being truthful with yourself and others.
So, as the 4th quarter began, so did my new enlightened spirit. Yes, there are those out there who will always be selfish and destructive. Yes, everyday will not be our best days, but we still get out of bed each day to conquer the next day with the same guts. I have come to realize that people may come into our lives to distract and interrupt us for their own benefit. Others will come into our lives to capture the good energy we put forth and there are those who will come into our lives to enhance us and make us our best, or, at then very least, our better. To love ourselves prevents us from harboring trickery towards others. To be loved and knowing it stops us from hating. I end the year on the same note for which it started for me. For that, I am grateful. I remain as knowing and capturing the moments as they come to me day by day. I choose to take the past as let it remain in its archive. A very good friend told me to not look into the past for answers but rather live in the day and look towards the future where I will find my answers, my peace. He is right, thus... Past, OUT!! Good bye to the past, hello to the present and I look forward to you, my future.
Happy Holidays to all of you and thank you for reading my blogs this past year. There are big things happening in 2012, not only for me, but for my friends I have now and the new ones I look forward to meeting.
Best,
Mike
