Sunday, September 15, 2013

Reason, Season...Lifetime





Reason, Season....Lifetime



Recently, someone came back into my life to teach, without knowing he was teaching,  me some valuable lessons on life, relationships, vulnerability, connection and self.   I had asked him why after such a long lull in our communication why he decided to come back and reconnect with me.  He hadn't given me a straight answer. I thought it was because he was bored, that maybe true, but I'd also like to think that it was because, for me, I needed to define more of who I am and what I want.  I guess I needed to be reminded that  people come in and out of our lives  for a greater purpose.  Either we choose to embrace them or ignore them.  I choose to embrace them as it makes me feel fuller and stronger and smarter, wiser and more courageous.  If no one ever said "hello" we'd never know "good-bye" and we'd miss out on so many moments that life gives and takes from us so quickly.  In the past, I would have chosen to be angry and tired and bothered by the time wasted on people who pop into my life selfishly or without content.  But, as I have trudged through the deep mud of life and climbed mountains in order to see the sunrise from the summit, I have come into my own knowing better who I am, what I'm capable of and less afraid of the "good-bye" and looking forward to more "hellos".   In order to clearly know oneself, we have to dig deep...its scary.  But, at the same time, it can be freeing.  And with that freedom, we are more likely able in a full capacity to give our authentic self to those who deserve it.  Those people who are with us for a lifetime are most deserving of our vulnerability and authenticity.  In the meantime, we can give pieces of ourselves to those who come to us either for a season or a reason.   I love the words of the poet John Herrera; "you learn the subtle difference between holding a hand and sharing a life....each step taken in a new direction creates a path towards the promise of a brighter dawn...with every goodbye, you learn".  Its not headline news that we all want to connect and belong to each other.  But, what I think is most powerful and fulfilling is when we do connect and feel  a big sense of belonging, we are our TRUE SELF.  And, knowing that, we can be peaceful inside ourselves and safe from not only the world, but safe from ourselves.  A dear friend has always expressed that people come into our lives for a Reason, Season and Lifetime.  I have found this poem that expresses that eloquently.  Enjoy. 



When someone is in your life for a REASON,
it is usually to meet a need you have expressed.
They have come to assist you through a difficulty; 
to provide you with guidance and support; 
to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. 
They may seem like a godsend, and they are. 
They are there for the reason you need them to be.


Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, 
this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end.
Sometimes they die. Sometimes they walk away. 
Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. 
What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled; their work is done. 
The prayer you sent up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a SEASON
because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. 
They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. 
They may teach you something you have never done. 
They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. 
Believe it. It is real. But only for a season.

LIFETIME relationships teach you lifetime lessons; 
things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. 
Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person, 
and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life. 
It is said that love is blind but friendship is clairvoyant.

— A poem by Brian Andrew "Drew" Chalker